She smiled to him, once again, in the rooftop of her apartment. From her corner eyes, she could see intensively his creature. Not just a creature, but a perfect looking. Maybe not for other pepole, but this word perfectly fit for her view.
How could she describe he?
His skull perfectly matched with the shoved hair. The eagle eyes and childish grinned. His height which always made him tease her, because her body just reached his shoulder. The rolled up sleeves of his brown jacket revealed the muscle of his hand, and watch in his wrist, show more his masculinity. Oh, no more words could say about him.
And their relationship… so complicated.
They knew for a long time ago, about each other feeling. He said for her, and she said about hers too. But for under circumstances, everything couldn’t go smoothly. If someone always said friend will end to a love relationship, maybe it’s true. But not in their way. Not with clear tittle.
Because actually, they never be a couple.
His smirk appeared again, when he told a story about his college, activity, and the clinical-soon activity. For medical students like them, told about this stories not gave a boredom, opposite it, they enjoyed it. She heard it carefully, with glued looking in their eyes.
She bit her lower lips, till when they had this relationship? What are them?
Couple? They never be.
Couple to be? Friend with benefits? Maybe.
Although they never be in clear relationship, actually they did something like holding hand or embracing like a couple. They never shy too said obviously their feeling, their missed, their wanted about each other. Their desires. How many times about ‘I love you’ , ‘I miss you’ and ‘I want to meet you’ words.
maybe they wanted more. But couldn’t.
“So, Lion, I had a case yesterday. About a mother with major bleeding after baby delivery…” he started telling about another thing.
He always called she ‘Lion’ or ‘Dandelion’. Not because it was her real name. But because she liked that flying seed.
“Bleeding? Sand, maybe you must give medicine which work in constriction of blood vessel? Because of oxytocin hormones stimulate contraction of that vessels, you must suppress it. Maybe estrogen suppressor will work, since estrogen stimulating oxytocin activation.”
And she, called he ‘Sand’. It was from she actually. Since he like sands in the beach, fly when you want holding it. Like him. She always afraid about losing him if she asked about their relationship.
How if he choose to disappear from her life?
How if this happiness come to end?
Really, she never ready for this.
Dandelion and sand. Two things that have similarity. Used to be free in the air, couldn’t be held. And like that too, they mixed each other perfectly in the wind, just too dropped together in one field.
But still, couldn’t be held.
And now… dandelion wanted hold the sand.
“Sand, do you miss me?” she suddenly asked when the silence grabbing them. But then, the silence became more intense, with wide pupils of him that looked in her eyes. Surprise, maybe.
“Sure, Lion. Why you asked like that? We never meet for four months already.” this smirk appeared.
Oh my, her fluttered heart when she heard his sincerely words, when she looked his seductively eyes.
It wasn’t good. And never be good.
How could she forget him if her heart continue loving to?
She breathed heavily, and looked back his eyes. With full of her brave, she asked her sincerest feel…
“Sand, if I fall, would you catch me, Sand?”
a silence wrapping them.